Anyone who has been around me while I sleep knows that I have a tendency to snore loudly, and ‘snore loudly’ is an understatement.  I’m fairly certain geologists at the National Earthquake Information Center in Golden, Colorado can look over their seismometer charts and tell exactly when I fall asleep each night.  I am fortunate to live close to an airport as our neighbors most likely mistake my snoring for commercial aircraft departing in the middle of the night.  I earned the nickname “buzzsaw” from a couple of praise and worship bandmates a few years ago when they were in rooms across from me one time during an annual youth retreat at which our band was playing.

As funny as that all might seem, my loud snoring is an indicator that I suffer from sleep apnea, a condition in which sleep brings about repeated cessations in breathing.  And while my family had been telling me I had this issue, it wasn’t until I went for a sleep study that the message hit home of just how bad it was.  The doctor used the term “severe severe apnea” and the words “shortened life span” jumped at me when I stole a glance at the page that contained the results of my sleep study.  Apparently the chronic stoppage of breathing puts undue strain on the heart which can lead to an enlarged heart.

Fortunately, sleep apnea can be easily corrected with the use of a pneumatic device which is worn at night and keeps the air passages open by supplying air that is slightly pressurized.  After using the machine for only a couple of nights, I immediately noticed a difference in how I was feeling.  Since my body was no longer choking itself while I slept, I was able to enter into the deep sleep stages my mind needed to experience each night.  No longer did I wake up feeling like I hadn’t slept, and the mental fog in which I had been suffering from for Lord knows how long, finally was lifted.

What is amazing about all of this is how unaware I was of the effect my sleep apnea was having on the rest of my life.  It’s much easier to notice suffocation when one is awake.  If you knew that you were depriving yourself of oxygen on a regular basis, you would know why and would be more aware that your body and mind are not functioning to their fullest capability.  But when the suffocation happens when we are asleep, we don’t see the effect since we aren’t aware there is a problem in the first place.

And this apnea can happen to all of us in our lives of faith.  We fall asleep in our faith- sometimes it might be for a long time, or sometimes it might be a short nap.  But it can happen to us on a regular basis.  And when we fall asleep spiritually, we suffer from spiritual apnea.  And we often don’t see the negative effects the spiritual apnea has on our lives because the spiritual suffocation occurs when we aren’t aware.  All of us do things or are exposed to things (temptation) that put us at risk of spiritual apnea (sin).  We become so accustomed to it we don’t realize there is a problem.  We need to be awake spiritually to know when we spiritually stop breathing.  Only then can we address the problem and only then will the effects of sin in our lives be removed.

So how do we know if we are suffering from spiritual apnea?  One of the ways is to do a regular “examination of conscience”.  As the Catholic Church succinctly explains, an examination of conscience is “prayerful self-reflection on our words and deeds in the light of the Gospel to determine how we may have sinned against God”.  This examination can take place on many levels, and focus on different areas of our lives.  One of the simplest examinations offered is how we live our lives according to the 10 Commandments.

Once we are aware of how we suffer from spiritual apnea, how do we correct it?  What are the “pneumatic devices” we can use to overcome our self-induced suffocation?  It is interesting to note that “pneumatic” not only is defined as having to do with air, but also as “of or as relating to the spirit”.  God, our greatest healer and physician, offers us many things to overcome our spiritual apnea.  Regularly reading Holy Scripture, attending church every Sunday, receiving the sacraments are just some of the ways we all can make sure our spiritual airways remain open.  But it is important to remember that none of this is possible unless we are fully awake and aware as to when and how we are spiritually suffocating ourselves.  Don’t fool yourself into thinking you don’t sin.  We all do.  It is in our fallen nature to do so.  To think otherwise is to have fallen asleep spiritually.

I’m glad and fortunate that I finally went in for a sleep study.  It’s probably saved my life.  As much as I must admit that strapping to my face each night a small mask over my nose that has a long hose running from it has improved my sleep, I look silly when I wear it.  Our small Westland Highland White Terrier likes to attack the vacuum cleaner hose whenever my wife is vacuuming.  I’m fairly certain that one of these nights the dog will attack me in my sleep after mistaking the breathing hose for the vacuum cleaner hose.  Hopefully she won’t as I don’t want to explain that to the insurance company…